Just want to get my point across.

I didn't really know a better place to put this.. but, yeah.

Well.. it's been a while since I first noticed this, but I figured it was about time I got some help. Well, I play tennis.. and it feels like I have to try harder than other people to get a little attention.. and respect. I get a lot of attention, but not because of tennis, but only because I'm small in size. "Oh, Yeah, Toshi! Nice shot!" I didn't even get it over the net... When somebody else hits the ball into the net, nothing is said. I'm always pitied.. in some sort of way. That doesn't happen in my schoolwork, though. I already gave my teachers that first impression of being "a good kid.." or what not.
I feel like I always have to try harder than another person, or I have to rely on somebody else's help all the time. When people look at me, it doesn't really spark that image where I'm really good at something. It may even lead them to believe that I'm an annoying little kid that always needs help or something. I just want people to notice me for who I am.. what I'm made of. I want them to know.. that I'm not living just to annoy people and ask for help... that I can do stuff by myself and I can make myself stronger in my own ways.
I asked my friend what Naruto character I related to the most. Based on this, I thought I was more like Naruto, who wants people to recognize his skills and acknowledge him, but my friend had told me I was more like Konohamaru, who is rather a small and plain character, whose grandfather was an important person of the village. That really pissed me off. To be seen from only my size, by my own friend. It's like I'm being judged or something... like I'm not important. Whatever I do is good, simply because I'm only "a child" to them. It's like when a kid draws something for their mother, and even though the mother knows that the drawing is absolutely crappy, she praises the kid anyway, saying it's great and everything.
You see, I don't want any more of that in my life, and I'm not going to eat a crap load of vegetables just so that people notice me. Sure, I act like an idiot sometimes for attention.. but I just want to give off that kind of image.. because I'd rather be taken in as just an idiot than an idiot that always needs help getting to his feet.

I just wanted my point across... and if you read this whole thing, maybe you'll understand what I'm going through. Thanks for reading it..

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Xanga: LittleMoogle
AIM: r0ck leee

I want to make a Naruto banner. ._.; That's in construction.

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I'm not exactly sure how to help you out, but perhaps your actions are also influencing people's view of you. Your actions probably influence your image as well.

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I can't even start picking you apart. You're an overall semi-pathetic (you're almost there, close), attention seeking person. Its kind of amazing how self infatuated you are. You take everything around you as a personal offense, which if you havent realized by now, is a mistake.

quote:

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I just want people to notice me for who I am.. what I'm made of. I want them to know.. that I'm not living just to annoy people and ask for help... that I can do stuff by myself and I can make myself stronger in my own ways.

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It's not like I can help it.. when I look in the mirror.. it's like I don't want to be me anymore. I don't want to hate myself.. but I let my mind take over and let that do everything. It's like I have no control over myself.. and because my actions might reflect on certain stuff.. maybe I should just sit down, and be quiet, act normal..? I let my emotions get carried away.. and every little thing that someone says or does.. it ends up hurting me in one way. Soon enough, I have this huge grudge. I feel so confused.. and worst of all, I don't even like myself that much.

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AIM: r0ck leee

I want to make a Naruto banner. ._.; That's in construction.

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start doing drugs.

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Kay.

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AIM: r0ck leee

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quote:

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Originally posted by TorrentialVVind
Kay.

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Yeay. Acid.

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Xanga: LittleMoogle
AIM: r0ck leee

I want to make a Naruto banner. ._.; That's in construction.

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yeah at least people pay attention to u U should feel lucky.

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"Fear less, hope more;
Whine less, breathe more;
Talk less, say more;
Hate less, love more;
And all good things are yours."

-Sweedish Proverb


aim: MaGiKToToRo
xanga: MaGiKToToRo

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quote:

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Originally posted by MaGiKToToRo
yeah at least people pay attention to u U should feel lucky.

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wana chat?
aim: LiQUiD PhLiP o1
xanga: AZNpinoyBOI

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Trying to see what anime character you resemble the most? Wow dude, that's pretty fucking sad.

Ajy is spot on; stop your self-indulgent whining and deal with it.

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ni pour ni contre; ça m'est égal

"The weight of this sad time we must obey,/ Speak what we feel, not what we ought to say./ The oldest hath borne most; we that are young/ Shall never see so much, nor live so long."
King Lear (V.3.300-304)

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hm at tennis u fool around a lot maybe if u worked on ur stroke and toned down a little people would think ur serious and take u seriously

__________________
"Fear less, hope more;
Whine less, breathe more;
Talk less, say more;
Hate less, love more;
And all good things are yours."

-Sweedish Proverb


aim: MaGiKToToRo
xanga: MaGiKToToRo

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if people get the wrong impression of you, i think that is not really their fault. You seem to think you are some diamond in the rough, and that no one can see it except yourself. I am not sure how that is anyone's fault except your own.

If everyone views you that way, and your actions contradict what you think you really are, then i say they probably have the right impression of you and you have the wrong one.


You are what you are, not what you think, or hope to be.

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Long messages do not equal aggravation of any sort,
rather they reflect nothing more than a response of insight
that should always be read in a matter-of-fact tone.

"Those womyn that seek equality with men, lack determination."

"I beseech you, in the bowels of Christ, think it possible you may be wrong."
-Cromwell

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aight i know wuts happenin

we treat u like that because ur small and seem delicate. but as soon as we start pushing u or start making fun of u like the rest of the people u bitch off

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wana chat?
aim: LiQUiD PhLiP o1
xanga: AZNpinoyBOI

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It's like I'm 5481734890127 different people. One thing tells me to do this, the other thing tells you to do that, this one, that one, everything points at a different direction. It's like an identity crisis or something. I don't know what to listen to. Okay, I'm taking a lot of shit into offense.. but that's just me. I've always been like that.. and it's like.. this is when these things start pointing at directions that I can't even see. "Okay, Change yourself.".. "No, don't! You're just going to make a fool out of yourself!".. "No. Don't do it.. Just don't!" "I don't really care any more.".." You want people to acknowledge you? Don't change yourself, screw them!" Ugh, my mind has a mind of its own, and I can't even control it anymore. Sometimes.. I really question if I like myself.. or if I hate myself. I talk to myself a lot.. It's really weird.. but in another way, it's perfectly normal. Or other times, I just don't really care. That's just the mood where you want to give this face.. ..It's hard for me to like myself when I don't 'even know who I really am..' Don't know.. maybe it's just me that can't see it, because.. I'm just me.

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Xanga: LittleMoogle
AIM: r0ck leee

I want to make a Naruto banner. ._.; That's in construction.

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if even you do not know who you are, stop getting mad at other people for not seeing who you think you are. Evevn you do not know.

Naruto...heh.

You just described the many different people in your head...it seems terribly normal to me...i do not see anything odd about what you wrote about. at all. Maybe you are making it a big deal when it is not? At least the part about you being manhy differnet people and that there is somethign wrong with you,.

__________________
Long messages do not equal aggravation of any sort,
rather they reflect nothing more than a response of insight
that should always be read in a matter-of-fact tone.

"Those womyn that seek equality with men, lack determination."

"I beseech you, in the bowels of Christ, think it possible you may be wrong."
-Cromwell

Last edited by PsychoSnowman on 04-23-2004 at 05:50 AM

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There always is suicide...

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quote:

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You just described the many different people in your head...it seems terribly normal to me...i do not see anything odd about what you wrote about. at all. Maybe you are making it a big deal when it is not? At least the part about you being manhy differnet people and that there is somethign wrong with you,.

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AIM: r0ck leee

I want to make a Naruto banner. ._.; That's in construction.

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