Allow me tell share with you a story about my funky cheese experience...

Ever had one of those days where you walk into a room and a stale stench seems to be lingering in the air?

Well, Monday morning, I came in, cranky as hell cuz I had a pile of work waiting for me to get through for the day when 'lo and behold, I smelled something akin to a dead skunk around my desk...we're talking nasty, pungent, MUSKY, funky smell.

Ok, I figured the vents in the office must have been off during the weekend or something....the smell will pass...u'll see....

I turn on my computer and proceed with the usual log-in process. I am privileged (or not so privileged) enough that I share a quad with 3 other people at my team. We do a lot of projects so this worked out well for us. So after saying hi to everyone and noticing them all frowning, I proceeded with my work.

2 hours pass and the smell was getting stronger. Ok...there is something wrong here.....I started thinking maybe I stepped on something when I was walking outside so to prevent any sort of embarrassment to myself, I rush to the washroom and proceeded to do a smell down...I went through my sweater, my coat, my shoes, my pants. Little did I know, my other team mates has thought of the same thing and has gone into the washroom to do the exact same thing....'cept for 1 person....

I casually asked the girl that sat across from me if she sensed or smelled something different around our quad....she looked at me with incredulous eyes and exclaimed "U TOO??!?!?!" (thus explained the frowning earlier that day) Oy...we got a problem. We had to figure out what the damn smell was otherwise it's going to drive us insane. 11:30am and I already had a migraine...

Walking back to my desk, I ran into my other team mate. Now, being the direct person that he was, he asked me if I smelled some funky cheese smell around our area and whether I knew where it came from? I think he was ready to kill whoever brought that "funky cheese" in at that point. I couldn't help it, I just busted out laughing because the whole situation was just so funny at that time but thoroughly disgusting as well.

We all decided to be sleuths at that point and investigate where that hideous smell was coming from. First we checked my desk, I climbed under my desk, rummaged through my drawers and emptied out my trash..the two other people did the same. We cleaned our desks until it was shining and we all sat down with relief when it was all done thinking we conquered that battle. I even sprayed out area with some carpet cleaner stuff!

Soon after though we realized that we didn't even come close as that obnoxious order came wafting by again. I failed to notice it until then that this smell seemed to show its ugly head whenever my OTHER team mate stood up and walked over to the other desk. Hmmmm......I wonder what's over there????

Now before I can go on, let me explain a little something about my dear old team mate....I think every department has one of these types in their office. Um....let's just say her personality is somewhat abrasive yet, she seemed to be the most vulnerable. I guess she is one of those people who try really hard to be liked but just comes out the wrong way.

Don't get me wrong, I get along with her just fine but approaching her can be somewhat intimidating as well cuz u never know when she might snap.

Anyways, back to my story...As she was busy chatting it away, I went over her desk and ta-da!!!! there they were! a pair of smelly, old, stinky boots!!!! She took her bloody snow boots off and was walking around and spreading the stanky air all around! I turned green and I went around to my desk and proceeded to mutter to myself, "nasty gouda cheese"..more like I should be mumbling "toe cheese"

After sharing my findings with my quad mates, I was shoved towards my manager's office to inquiring on ways of getting rid of this problem and get rid of it FAST!!!

My manager and I came up with a couple of ideas:

1) stick a dozen or so air fresheners under her desk
2) do a david copperfield thing and just make the damn thing
disappear
3) do a mission impossible thing and have a whole operation
on how to steal and dispose of the foul object

We finally decided that we're going to get the manager to come over and mention something about the skanky air and to dispose of anything and everything which might contribute to the smell such as shoes, food etc....(I know, we're a bunch of PC chickens but I really did like my desk....) She took home those boots that afternoon.

I can happily report that it's been 4 days since that incident and our noses have all recovered from the trauma. But every once in awhile, I'd still throw in a "Smell Gouda?? " line to my team mates....just for old times sake....

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