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Jusunlee.com Forums > Entertainment > Creative Writing > The Small Scrawny Soldier
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garciaas
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Cool The Small Scrawny Soldier

The Small Scrawny Soldier



Some time soon swept across the spinning world when sick, sad, sailor Saukville from Sadat died for he was not *salutary. Every single sack in the sinking, sedulous old house that was salable was sold and surprisingly the sinking house itself stumbled down for by this time the sinking sedulous house not salvable. “A splendid thing too,” said the *scandalous *sanctimonious people as soon as the spreading news spread to them. But now salutatory Sam was sad. He loved the *salient, sinking house. Soon a new, stylish house was set up but not exactly where the sinking, sulfurous, old house had stood. A small garden was planted on that site of the new, stylish house. The sad boy grew and got married to a Saudi – Arabian woman and soon decided to stay at the new, stylish house. One sunny Saturday while his sweet wife was tending to the sweet-scented smelling scarlet runner in the garden she pricked her small finger on something sharp that was sticking out of the soft earth. What could it be? It was the small scrawny soldier! The same one, which had fallen through the crack in the slippery floorboards all those years ago. Sedulous Sam was so happy to see him again. He had a special case made for him and stood it on his solid, strong stand. It was a great honor for the small, scrawny solder and it made him screech.

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Old Post 03-02-2005 10:45 PM
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PsychoSnowman
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WHOA! you CAN soundn smart.

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"Those womyn that seek equality with men, lack determination."

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Old Post 03-26-2005 12:37 AM
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garciaas
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quote:
Originally posted by PsychoSnowman
WHOA! you CAN soundn smart.


What did I tell you?

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Old Post 03-29-2005 04:28 PM
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kiggaplease
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quote:
Originally posted by PsychoSnowman
WHOA! you CAN soundn smart.


nice

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Old Post 04-02-2005 09:12 AM
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garciaas
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quote:
Originally posted by kiggaplease
nice


Thank you. I can even say so myself!

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Old Post 04-07-2005 01:35 AM
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PsychoSnowman
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quote:
Originally posted by garciaas
What did I tell you?


i forgot about this thread, but i was being sarcastic. You are using different words than you usually use, but it sounds forced, doesn't flow well, and the words you use are not even the best choices to be using. You went for alliteration, but i think it is a bad sacrifice. A strong point of higher vocabulary is that it increases the precision/specificity of your words so as to eliminate uncertainties within your discourse. It does not sound intelligent, it does not sound smart, it sounds forced and it sounds like you looked up everything in a thesaurus (which is not a bad thing, but it is definatley noticeable and it would have been a better story had i not had to accept some of the sacrificed words you chose (i.e. sulforous house...sulfurous?, definately was a tradeoff there in regards to meaning, and while you are at it, you could have just called the house a shack..but that's another trade off isn't it? Do you see what i am getting at? Synonyms are never exactly synonymous.

as i said here: http://www.jusunlee.com/forums/show...mp;pagenumber=3

quote:
Originally posted by PsychoSnowman

Oh, and if you really believe you can sound like an intellectual, i find that humorous. I believe you think you can speak like what you think is an intellectual, but from what we are getting from the forums, your diction is not nearly of high enough rhetoric, you know little about anything in the world...and those two things are a necessity for even trying to be intelligent (in your eyes). It would take you hours of flipping through a thesaurus to write anything seemingly intelligent, and even then no one wil be fooled. Noobs confuse intelligence with diction, veterans know that intelligence is displayed no matter how poor one's diction may be. It's in the content girly. though, whatever helps you sleep at night, of course.

__________________
Long messages do not equal aggravation of any sort,
rather they reflect nothing more than a response of insight
that should always be read in a matter-of-fact tone.

"Those womyn that seek equality with men, lack determination."

"I beseech you, in the bowels of Christ, think it possible you may be wrong."
-Cromwell

Last edited by PsychoSnowman on 05-11-2005 at 11:49 PM

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Old Post 05-11-2005 11:43 PM
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garciaas
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[QUOTE]Originally posted by PsychoSnowman
[B]i forgot about this thread, but i was being sarcastic.

Oh, so now you're changing the story. Funny, ain't it?......How you just 'FORGOT' about this thread.

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Old Post 05-12-2005 11:29 PM
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garciaas
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[QUOTE]Originally posted by PsychoSnowman
[B] and the words you use are not even the best choices to be using.

..................maybe

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Old Post 05-12-2005 11:31 PM
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garciaas
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[QUOTE]Originally posted by PsychoSnowman
[B] You went for alliteration, but i think it is a bad sacrifice.

Just to let you know.......alliteration is my favorite sound pattern in poetry. I use it all the time......I'm so used to it! I can make up anything and at the very beginning, the ideas are great. I go by first feelings: I write down whatever comes to my mind, even if it doesn't make sense. If it comes, I make sure gets written down. T H E N................... I sit back and re-write/revise and proof-read. I had made up a great poem about my little brother (I have so many things to say about him but negative thoughts, however! ). In that poem (cannot recall the name at the moment).....every line ends in 'tion.' I used consonance, which is another one of my favorite sound patterns to use in poetry. Unfortunately, though, I had accidentally deleted it off my computer and I had misplaced the print out I had made. Oh, man! that was a masterpiece and I still can't believe that I lost it!

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Old Post 05-12-2005 11:38 PM
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garciaas
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[QUOTE]Originally posted by PsychoSnowman
[B] A strong point of higher vocabulary is that it increases the precision/specificity of your words so as to eliminate uncertainties within your discourse. It does not sound intelligent, it does not sound smart, it sounds forced and it sounds like you looked up everything in a thesaurus (which is not a bad thing, but it is definatley noticeable and it would have been a better story had i not had to accept some of the sacrificed words you chose (i.e. sulforous house...sulfurous?, definately was a tradeoff there in regards to meaning, and while you are at it, you could have just called the house a shack..


I don't care if my poem sounds smart or not......(to you at least!). If I like it, it's perfect. I'm not trying to impress you (or anyone) at all. I just try to do something different than I usually do (since I'm always trying out different things.) Oh, and about the thesaurus thing.......I didn't use a thesaurus at all, but of couse, I don't expect someone like you psycho, to believe me.

Oh, and about calling the house a shack.........shack has an 'sh' sound. I wanted only s, for s is one of my favorite letters. I can say it would flow better if I had said sulfurous shack, but I didn't want it to be a shack, I wanted it to be a house. I aim for what I want, not what other people want (only in certain circumstances this 'rule' changes).

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Old Post 05-12-2005 11:48 PM
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PsychoSnowman
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quote:
Originally posted by garciaas
[QUOTE]Originally posted by PsychoSnowman
[B]i forgot about this thread, but i was being sarcastic.

Oh, so now you're changing the story. Funny, ain't it?......How you just 'FORGOT' about this thread.



you are a forgettable person

__________________
Long messages do not equal aggravation of any sort,
rather they reflect nothing more than a response of insight
that should always be read in a matter-of-fact tone.

"Those womyn that seek equality with men, lack determination."

"I beseech you, in the bowels of Christ, think it possible you may be wrong."
-Cromwell

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Old Post 05-13-2005 12:31 AM
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PsychoSnowman
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quote:
Originally posted by garciaas
[QUOTE]Originally posted by PsychoSnowman
[B] You went for alliteration, but i think it is a bad sacrifice.

Just to let you know.......alliteration is my favorite sound pattern in poetry. I use it all the time......I'm so used to it! I can make up anything and at the very beginning, the ideas are great. I go by first feelings: I write down whatever comes to my mind, even if it doesn't make sense.



hahaha, that goal is horrid. it's as if you play basketball, but only care about holding the ball, not playing well.

quote:

If it comes, I make sure gets written down. T H E N................... I sit back and re-write/revise and proof-read. I had made up a great poem about my little brother (I have so many things to say about him but negative thoughts, however! ). In that poem (cannot recall the name at the moment).....every line ends in 'tion.


sounds like another mediocrely skilled rapper that you might like, ludacris (he does that more than most rappers i have noticed).

__________________
Long messages do not equal aggravation of any sort,
rather they reflect nothing more than a response of insight
that should always be read in a matter-of-fact tone.

"Those womyn that seek equality with men, lack determination."

"I beseech you, in the bowels of Christ, think it possible you may be wrong."
-Cromwell

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Old Post 05-13-2005 12:34 AM
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garciaas
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quote:
Originally posted by PsychoSnowman
you are a forgettable person


You were the one who said you forgot, not me!

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Old Post 05-13-2005 11:03 PM
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garciaas
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[QUOTE]Originally posted by PsychoSnowman
[B]hahaha, that goal is horrid. it's as if you play basketball, but only care about holding the ball, not playing well.

As I told you, this is in the beginning! It's called "free writing" if you didn't know! I'll connect it to the basketball case.........

My Case:

1. I don't have any well-thought idea of what I will write
2. When I do get it, all I want to do at first is get it on paper
3. When I do, then I worry about errors/grammer, word choice, etc.

Basketball case:

1. I don't have the ball
2. When I get the ball, all I want to do is try and make a shot
3. When I do, then I worry whether I played well or not and if I didn't I try to play it the right way and still make the shot!

That's what I would do if I was playing basketball!

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Old Post 05-13-2005 11:12 PM
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PsychoSnowman
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quote:
Originally posted by garciaas
You were the one who said you forgot, not me!


uhh...i forgot because you are a forgettable person... ..do you somehow...not understand?

__________________
Long messages do not equal aggravation of any sort,
rather they reflect nothing more than a response of insight
that should always be read in a matter-of-fact tone.

"Those womyn that seek equality with men, lack determination."

"I beseech you, in the bowels of Christ, think it possible you may be wrong."
-Cromwell

Last edited by PsychoSnowman on 05-14-2005 at 02:24 AM

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Old Post 05-14-2005 02:01 AM
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garciaas
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quote:
Originally posted by PsychoSnowman
uhh...i forgot because you are a forgettable person... ..do you somehow...not understand?


Premise #1: Garciaas only understands statements that make sense

Premise #2: Garciaas does not understand Psycho's statement

Conclusion: Therefore, psychoSnownman's statement does not make sense!

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Old Post 05-16-2005 11:19 PM
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PsychoSnowman
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premise #1: anyone else can understand what i said, though i care not to call people to arms to verify this premise

premise #2: garciaas does not understand

conclusion: garciaas is still a dumbass

__________________
Long messages do not equal aggravation of any sort,
rather they reflect nothing more than a response of insight
that should always be read in a matter-of-fact tone.

"Those womyn that seek equality with men, lack determination."

"I beseech you, in the bowels of Christ, think it possible you may be wrong."
-Cromwell

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Old Post 05-17-2005 01:32 AM
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aaqthree
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I think she does not know what the meaning of the word 'forgettable' is.

You have to remember, PS, that any time you use words that a normal 11 year old might not know, you'll run into these problems with garciaas.

Though I'm struggling to believe that most 11 year olds do not know what "forgettable" means. Which, of course, just means that our favorite one is very special.

As for you, garciaas, let's have a lesson in vocabulary, shall we? (first lesson: my tone right now is one of "condescension" [look it up], and what I am doing to you right now is called "patronizing" you [look that up too])

"Forgettable" comes from the word "forget". It is used as an adjective to describe anyone who is likely to be forgotten. In this case, PS is insinuating that it is easy for you to be forgotten ("you are a forgettable person"), or, in other words, that it is easy for people to forget you, to justify his prior statement that he forgot about this thread. It also has the effect of insinuating that you do not leave much of an impression on anyone, as forgettable people tend to be ones whose character rarely ever leaves an impression on others.

Understand?

Good, now you can pass the first grade!

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Old Post 05-17-2005 06:32 PM
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garciaas
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quote:
Originally posted by PsychoSnowman
premise #1: anyone else can understand what i said, though i care not to call people to arms to verify this premise

premise #2: garciaas does not understand

conclusion: garciaas is still a dumbass



Woohooooooooo! Way to go for GARCIAAS! You know, I used to like this game, but now, it's getting a little old and boring, tha's cuz I win ALL the time! By now, I would have expected such a ..........such an INTELLECTUAL person to know what I'm up to. Unfortunately, he STILL hasn't learned! And maybe.....he never WILL!

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Old Post 05-17-2005 11:12 PM
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garciaas
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quote:
Originally posted by aaqthree
I think she does not know what the meaning of the word 'forgettable' is.

You have to remember, PS, that any time you use words that a normal 11 year old might not know, you'll run into these problems with garciaas.

Though I'm struggling to believe that most 11 year olds do not know what "forgettable" means. Which, of course, just means that our favorite one is very special.

As for you, garciaas, let's have a lesson in vocabulary, shall we? (first lesson: my tone right now is one of "condescension" [look it up], and what I am doing to you right now is called "patronizing" you [look that up too])

"Forgettable" comes from the word "forget". It is used as an adjective to describe anyone who is likely to be forgotten. In this case, PS is insinuating that it is easy for you to be forgotten ("you are a forgettable person"), or, in other words, that it is easy for people to forget you, to justify his prior statement that he forgot about this thread. It also has the effect of insinuating that you do not leave much of an impression on anyone, as forgettable people tend to be ones whose character rarely ever leaves an impression on others.

Understand?

Good, now you can pass the first grade!



Funny!

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Old Post 05-17-2005 11:15 PM
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