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Jusunlee.com Forums > Entertainment > Creative Writing > lost eternity
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MoOnLigHt
Suicidal Maniac

Registered: Jun 2002
Location: New York
Posts: 58
Status: Offline

lost eternity

wrote this one today.......


You're gone into a world that i cannot reach
My heart is frozen, like the cold winter beach
The way to erase, i wish i can teach
i wish memories would fade, like a dirty stain bleached

day by day i pray, because i need you back
because of you gone, my only hope i lack
you are far away, and the world is pitch black
i live a life of death, where past memories attack

I don't know how much, my fragile heart can bear
I now am the victim, of an incident yet so rare
i remember your eyes, and your golden brown hair
which under the luminous light, gave a silver glare

You were as fresh as new, but as comforting as old
your brown eyes were warm, but still your glances were cold
i wanted you to shape me, i wanted you to mold,
so i can be valued, and shine like precious gold

i remember your lips, soft and pink like peach
which opened to mel me down, with just one sweet speech
i remember you, the details, all and every each
But i wish to forget them, since i no longer can reach

you are gone away into heaven, and i'm thrown here forlorn
you are guarding me above, but i still want you reborn
i know you smile, but i can't help but mourn
why did you have to go, and leave my life so torn

will you please tell me, how to escape this sorrow
Should i follow you to heaven, and just meet you tomorrow
if you know the way, explain it clear and thorough
but first i ask, half of my life can you borrow?

can't we go back, to the times when we were happy
don't you miss the days, when we laughed and smiled with glee
hold me before i fall, and together let us be
because i am forever lost, lost in eternity..

__________________
I Don't know what is wrong, what is right
It makes no difference, they are the same things...
I don't know what to believe in, whom i can trust
There was no way to see, no way to prove that
Why do I have to wonder and wonder?
I don't know why, I don't know why, I don't know why
I don't know who my friends are, who my enemies are
They love me some, they cheat me some in the same way
Why do I have to live with them, why do I love them?
I really wish I could believe in your sweet sweet lies
I close my eyes and tears are falling
I really wish I could live alone with no one at all
I close my heart and dreams are tumbling
Sing, sing a fool's song I am a king without a kingdom
LaLaLa, I am a mother without a womb for my children
LaLaLaLa, I am a lover without a lover
oh..I am a foolish clown of the world..
I am a foolish clown of the world...

So.. I don't know what to believe in, Whom to rely on...
-Jaurim

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Old Post 08-27-2002 03:01 AM
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junjinluber33
Senior Member

Registered: Apr 2002
Location: cali
Posts: 2951
Status: Offline

good poem!! keep up the good work!

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Old Post 08-27-2002 08:10 AM
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MellowYellow
Moderator

Registered: Mar 2002
Location: In Transition, CA
Posts: 3259
Status: Offline

yet another awesom peom from moon light.. and look i can't even spell right....i don't feel like correcting it... blah..

deng....good good... keep em coming....

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Old Post 08-27-2002 08:27 AM
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HHxEliTE
S2

Registered: Jun 2002
Location: iN uR pOckET
Posts: 797
Status: Offline

wow... iss realie good :thumbup:

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sHIET happens.. then u move ON

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Old Post 08-28-2002 03:24 AM
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Nojeel
Senior Member

Registered: Jun 2002
Location: 501
Posts: 2197
Status: Offline

wow..that's all i can say..

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Recongizable

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Old Post 10-12-2002 07:36 PM
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merc
Moderator

Registered: Sep 2002
Location: .:New YorK:.
Posts: 455
Status: Offline

wow very nice... i've had my experience w/ poems...and in my honest opinion...you really have a talent...
I can clearly see that your poem is more then shallow rhymes... your words flow so lightly, yet each line has a picture....
keep posting.

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"Truth transcends fact."

"Truth is not determined by how many people believe it."

"All the darkness in the world can not extinguish the light of a single candle."

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Old Post 10-12-2002 09:25 PM
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saranghae
Moderator

Registered: May 2002
Location: cali
Posts: 4994
Status: Offline

nicee

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Old Post 10-12-2002 11:27 PM
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TyGer STyLe
no longer a couch jockey

Registered: Aug 2002
Location: Cerritos CA
Posts: 1225
Status: Offline

it sounds like a modern shakespearian (dun think i speeled that right) sonnet scept its too long to be a sonnet... haha newaiz very nice poem...

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Enter My Head!

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Old Post 10-15-2002 03:16 AM
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MoOnLigHt
Suicidal Maniac

Registered: Jun 2002
Location: New York
Posts: 58
Status: Offline

thank you for your comments ^^....and you did spell shakespearean right.....hehe

__________________
I Don't know what is wrong, what is right
It makes no difference, they are the same things...
I don't know what to believe in, whom i can trust
There was no way to see, no way to prove that
Why do I have to wonder and wonder?
I don't know why, I don't know why, I don't know why
I don't know who my friends are, who my enemies are
They love me some, they cheat me some in the same way
Why do I have to live with them, why do I love them?
I really wish I could believe in your sweet sweet lies
I close my eyes and tears are falling
I really wish I could live alone with no one at all
I close my heart and dreams are tumbling
Sing, sing a fool's song I am a king without a kingdom
LaLaLa, I am a mother without a womb for my children
LaLaLaLa, I am a lover without a lover
oh..I am a foolish clown of the world..
I am a foolish clown of the world...

So.. I don't know what to believe in, Whom to rely on...
-Jaurim

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Old Post 10-15-2002 08:39 PM
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LiLboy
Junior Member

Registered: Apr 2002
Location: OT, NJ
Posts: 24
Status: Offline

nice writing

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Old Post 10-22-2002 02:37 AM
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